Saturday, June 21
To counter anybody who says I don't listen to my readers (not that I expect any of you all to be so rude...), I've decided to make a fairly long post about the opposite sex. In this case, women. Before I start, however, I have a couple of things to point out:
Firstly, I've finally put up a Music Page. Spengy, enjoy. And everybody else too. A books-type page is coming soon as well. And I might even get round to starting the fabled photo-blog, or update the Art page. Too busy at the moment.
Secondly, has anybody else noticed that something subconscious in the human brain causes every single person to put on a silly voice when they are talking to a pet? I've cottoned on to this since I've been back at home. My little doggie had to have an operation on Tuesday, and he's been moping about since. My mum, my sister and even myself all talk to him in stupid voices, making a fuss of him. Why do we do this? Is it because we think they're of a lower intelligence than us, so we act retarded? Look out for this over the next few days, everybody does it!
Enough of that, on with the subject of the day: Women. I know that my readers are pretty much evenly split male - female, so perhaps the guys will understand some of this better than the ladies will. However, ladies, my words of wisdom (ahem!) could prove useful in your future conquests. Alanna, as an aside, do you prefer butch girls or pretty girls?
Hmmm, where to start? I suppose I should begin by stating that I might not be the best person to discuss this subject, what with the whole being a self-confessed virgin and all. Oh yeah, and only ever got off with a single-figure amount of girls too. Man, I suck at pulling. Anyway, this is my place to say what i want to say, so here goes.
There's a few things that I have noticed about women in general. On one hand, they can be very bitchy towards anybody that isn't their friend. On the other hand, they can be your best friend if they allow you to be their friend. I've got a load of female friends who I am really close too, and tell everything to (well, almost everything), but I can never envisage myself trying it on with them, just in case it went sour and destroyed the friendship .That's the problem I seem to have with women generally. The ones I like, perhaps even fall in love with, are those who are my closest friends. I value friends above anything in the world, even more than having a serious relationship, so I cannot ever bring myself to risk their friendship. At this point in my life, I would prefer to have a number of close friends than one intimate girlfriend. Between them, my friends know pretty much everything there is to know about me, and seeing as we're all in the same circle of friends, they each probably know everything. My life is an open book, so to speak.
Having said that the girls who I really like are those who are my closest friends, with whom I would never try anything on, I guess that leaves me to find a girlfriend amongst the public at large. Dammit, that's never going to happen. I have the lowest self-confidence ever when it comes to women, probably scared of rejection. This is fairly strange, because I'm a generally confident guy. I imagine this is tied in with the lack of success that I've had so far. One serious grilfriend, or one night where I pull could change things around entirely. Here's hoping. Hope, because I'm too lazy to attempt to remedy the situation myself.
When I go out for a night out to a bar or wherever, I'm not at all interested in pulling. I used to be completely obsessed with pulling if I was out in a bar, but so often I'd go home disappointed, blinded to the fact that I'd had a wicked night out, purely because I didn't pull. Nowadays, I go out to have a good time with my friends, and if I pull, so be it. I don't even bother going up to random girls and asking for a dance. What's the point? That fear of rejection again, possibly. I'm quite happy dancing with the female friends I actually go on the night out with, probaly ruining their night in fact, because they can't pull due to me dancing with them. I reckon I might try not dancing at all from now on, so everyone is happy. Which is a shame, because I quite like dancing, and I think I'm quite good at it. Counter-arguments willingly accepted. Matt, you've seen me dance, I think...
What else is there to say? Oh yeah, ladies, if someone comes up to you in a bar and asks you to dance, try to say no in a nice way. Groups of women can be fatal to the aspirations of a guy... They all sort of leer at you, and force the lady in question to knock you back. Grrrr, make up your own minds.
I'd love to have the confidence to go up to a random girl in the street and ask for her number, but I've never ever had the confidence to do it. I wasnt a scene like in a film, where everything just happens, without any falsehood or overt effort. I'm thinking the scene in American Beauty where the weird kid is showing the girl the film of the plastic bag, and is saying how there's so much beauty in the world. She takes hold of his hand, their eyes meet, and you can just see the emotion. I want that emotion! I want that scene! I want something like that to happen to me!
As a slight offshoot of that, at least it shows that a girl can make the first move, however minor. I'm all for most of the chivalrous stuff, such as buying drinks, opening doors, offering a seat and all of that stuff, but sometimes it's just nice not to have to risk everything. There's been a huge push for equality generally, so why is it still women who have the power in the opening stages of a relationship? They decide whether or not to start something, whether to go out for a second date or not, how quickly things should progress and everything like that. It's just not right.
I think I should draw this to a close, it has turned out to be an epic post, and very introspective. I hope it makes enjoyable reading, and doesn't sound like just some random rantings and outpourings from me. Who knows, I might see somebody on the street tomorrow...
Thursday, June 19
To quote from American Beauty...
And just why do I rule? Because I can get away with not getting out of bed until 1.30pm. Even my Mum didn't complain that much about it. This was because I was out last night for a few (many) drinks with a few amtes of mine that I hadn't seen for a while. We went to a couple of pubs in Seend, which is about 3 miles from where I live, and ended up drinking "Wacky" in a pub called The Brewery. It's called Wacky for a reason. It just completely fucks you up after only a couple of pints. Never mind that'd we had a few beers beforehand and some shots too...
We got the barman to fill up a (mostly) empty bottle of Famous Grouse with some more Wacky, then wandered off back into the village to Will's house so we could sleep there. The thing was, the school was on the way there, and the roof is really easy to get onto, even whilst inebriated. We sat up there for a little while, and started talking religion for some reason. I'm an atheist, and so is Robbie, but he was arguing that Christianity is the best religion because it is accepting of other faiths.
Anyway, got to pop out now, I'll finish this later... Back now, won 3 games of pool in a row. :)
Like I was saying, we were talking about religions, and I was saying that Christianity is anti-semitic by very definition. By having accepted Jesus as the Messiah / whatever, they are inherently different from Jews, who are still waiting for the Messiah. For some reason he couldn't accept this. Meh, no matter really. I like having debates, mainly because I don't always believe that my way / view is correct. I just enjoy picking holes in the opposition's arguments, sometimes without offering a counter-argument...
Back on with the tale of the evening. After getting back to Will's (I'll leave out the bit where they went and smoked some weed...) we crashed in the living room and put Jurassic Park on video on the TV. I hadn't seen that film in so long, and it is brilliant. Yes, the plot is fairly predictable, especially because everybody has seen it 100 times already, but try watching it as a piece of cinematic history and you'll realise just how good it and Spielberg is...
After that, I couldn't get to sleep, because I was on the world's smallest sofa ever, so I decided that I'd walk home and go to sleep in my bed. Only a 20 minute walk, I thought. 45 minutes later I just about made it to my front door... Stupid long walk along a main road at 3.30am. Hence me not waking up until 1.30 this afternoon.
Anyway, that was the story of my day. It actually seems really unexciting when I read it over, but it was good fun whilst it was happening... Same again Saturday night I reckon: I've heard of plans to go to Bath and get smashed. This is after an afternoon of golf and then a meal as well. Bye bye bank balance. But why else does money exist if not to be spent?
Orbital - Tunnel Trance
P Diddy - Let's Get Ill
Dizzie Rascal - I Luv U
Missy Elliott - Gossip Folks (Remix)
Oh, and can you all vote in the poll on the right? A three-way tie at the moment...
Tuesday, June 17
The Pictorial Guide
I want to set up a new blog with a single photo for each day on it, but I'm feeling far too lazy at the moment to do it. This is even though I manage to spend about 4 hours+ online each day doing other pointless stuff! I'll get round to it eventually, I'm sure. Just means that I've got to take some more photos. Actually, today I took enough to last for a fair while. I should say that it was my sister that took them, whilst I was driving. There's a couple of arty-looking ones which are cool. I'll put them up here at some point soon.
I was reading Alanna's blog a minute ago, where she mentioned that she gets 250+ visitors per day. I'm happy with my 15-20 per day. And they aren't even me since I blocked my IP from registering as a hit. Now I can refresh the page when I edit as often as I like without worrying about artificially increasing my hit counter. Sweet. Sort of sweet, anyway.
That music page I mentioned few days ago is still in the pipeline, as is a bookshelf page, inspired by Spengy's Blog that I found earlier. My reading tastes change all the time. Currently I'm on an anti-globalism / anti-corporate trip, as well as reading various classics such as The Comunist Manifesto and Darwin's Origin Of Species. Even Amazon has noticed this, and keeps suggesting loads of anti-corporate titles, as well as anti-american books. I could spend a fortune at that website...
Royksopp - Poor Leno
P Diddy - Let's Get Ill (Tune!)
Orbital - The Box
Wu Tang Clan - Protect Ya Neck
I Am A Geek
The Geek Test told me so. 27.21893% - Total Geek was my score. In my defence, it's mainly because I know a hell of a lot about computers and science and sci-fi and OH MY GOD I am a geek. Dammit. And there I was thinking that I was simply knowledgeable on the subjects. Right, there's going to be some serious beer drinking this weekend to compensate for this test result.
Monday, June 16
I've just added this little poll thingy on the right. I want to buy all of these albums / DVDs, but I'm not sure which one to get first. I'll probably end up getting all of them before the summer is over, but I figured that a little audience participation results in more of an audience! I will check on Sunday evening which one has got the most votes, and will order it from Play.com there and then. Providing I don't spunk all of my money up the wall on drinking before then...
I've also just started reading Globalization and Its Discontents by Joseph E Stiglitz today. It's about how globalization isn't the dream that everyone thought it would be, and how developing countries are screwed over by the western world. Should be quite a good read.
By the looks of things, Amazon.co.uk has a paperback sale on. Could prove fatal to my bank account, even though I've got 5+ books on my shelf waiting to be read...
Bits and Bobs
Hmmm, struggling for things to write about. I've not done much this weekend, which doesn't particularly explain why I haven't posted here... I was out and about Saturday night, went to this club with a few mates who I hadn't seen in a while. A good laugh actually, throwing the cocktails down our necks and playing some pool. I found myself slipping more and more back into the West Country vernacular, all "Ooo Arr" and so on. I hadn't really lost my accent whilst i was in London, but since I've been back home I've noticed that my accent has become stronger, mainly because everybody around me speaks the same. By the end of the summer I'll have a nice thick farmer's accent...
Yesterday was spent at my aunt and uncle's house with my family. It was Father's Day, which in my family means you have to spend it with the extended family. We all live local, so it's no big deal getting there or anything. Quite a good laugh actually, even though I wasn't drinking. Nice weather = BBQ = too much food. I managed to watch the Canadian Grand Prix too, which was a bonus. A boring race, but it got me out of the sun for a bit. Sometimes it's just too hot outside. Today as well, in fact. I only managed about 45 minutes to an hour of lying in the midday sun before I had to go inside.
The car got fixed, looks as good as new after I broke the bumper the other day. Unfortunately, the £125 cheque I'm getting back for my accomodation deposit is going straight to paying for the repair. Dammit, that was going to be my beer money for the rest of the month...
Which means I'm going to have to get a job, for beer money and to save money for next year at uni. Off down to the agency to find a crappy temping job tomorrow, methinks. I've done it a load of times before, but this time I want to find an office job rather than working in a factory. I've done some crap jobs in the relatively short time I've been working: A meat packing factory, a cake factory, an ice-cream factory (stupidly hot in there...) and electrical storage warehouse to name but a few. Not this year!!! He says...
And sorry to end on a negative note, but today my little doggy got diagnosed with cancer. Thankfully, it's benign, and is getting cut out tomorrow, but that's all my family needs. Like I said in an earlier post, my Dad had cancer a little while ago, which was a shit time for us all. We all love our dog to pieces, and my Mum was in floods of tears when she got back from the vet's. I think he'll be alright, no worries. Here's hoping.
Busta Rhymes - Make It Clap (Sean Paul Remix)
Metallica - Call Of The Ktulu
Paul Van Dyk - Nothing But You
Push vs Globe - Tranceformation