Tuesday, April 20
How To Lose Friends And Alienate People
Start A Blog.
Hmm, so I got a reaction today to yesterday's post, specifically the part concerning a couple of my housemates' "sympathy sex" that they are having or arranging at the moment. It turns out that they took offence at how their personal matters were being put on "the Internet" for all and sundry to read.
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amusing that it is only when something personal is written about someone that they choose to react? I've written so much stuff here about my housemates, and how they piss me off so much a hell of a lot of the time, yet it has taken discussion of their (somewhat questionable in my view) sex lives to generate an actual face-to-face reaction. I for one find that quite amusing and perhaps even slightly hypocritical.
But then again, I didn't ask them if I could write about them, just as I have never asked anyone if I could write about them here. Perhaps this was an error on my part, but how else would I go about it? Carry a pack of forms around with me, and make everyone who I see / think about sign one before I write anything about them? I think not. A simple vocal contract / agreement? Possibly, but then they'd probably want some sort of editorial control over what I write about them.
That is what would piss me off most. As I've said on numerous occasions, I don't present an image of myself here, I just present myself. I do the same with other people: there is no subjective view of them, just them as a whole. The events are obviously tainted somewhat by me relaying them here, but I try to be as non-judgmental as I can.
There are times, however, when I choose to be judgmental, when I choose to voice my opinion(s) of somebody. These can be positive, negative or merely observant. I feel the need to do this sometimes, because this is what I do in my head, and when I speak. We all do. We all make judgments about other people, and we all have opinions on them. If I didn't write these opinions here, there would be a big gaping hole in the overall presentation of myself.
I'm not Jesus, I do judge people and their actions. As much as I can help it, I try not to do it on first impressions or looks, but after knowing someone to some extent. This isn't always successful, but I have lived with my housemates (in this case) for long enough to know who they are and what makes them tick. I think this makes me fairly qualified to have an opinion on them.
No doubt they have opinions on me, indeed they will be drastically negative after yesterday's post, but that really doesn't matter to me. Everyone has opinions, as I said above, and everyone is entitled to have and to voice them. I would love to know what they truly think of me, I really would, but this is never raised whenever we are together. There is an inherent fear in everyone of telling someone to their face exactly what you think of them. I happen to write it here, they may talk about it amongst themselves or to other people. So what, I don't ask what is said in their conversations, not because I'm disinterested, but because I am not overly bothered whether the opinions of me are positive or negative.
I know disinterest and not being overly bothered seem like one and the same, but the distinction I am trying to draw is that I do not worry endlessly about what other people think of me, and nor do I particularly want to find out, since it is their own personal opinion. Why would anyone truly want to know what others think of them, unless they are a Mother Teresa-esque character? We all have our flaws and our bad traits, just as we have our good sides and positive attributes.
So yeah, if you want to piss people off, give them your opinion of them, be it vocally, or in a piece of writing somewhat similar to this one. You'll soon find out what they truly think of you as well, and everyone will be informed, if not necessarily happy.
