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Monday, August 4

I am tired. I am tired of my life right now. I am tired of my parents. I am tired of my friends. I am tired of the rut that I find myself in. I am tired of the guilt complex which accompanies me to sleep each night if I haven't posted anything on this blog. I am tired of the way in which the world and its unhabitants expects of me. I am tired of fulfilling those expectations. I am tired of not rebelling. I am tired of those who are claiming to be rebellious. I am tired of everyone around me. I am tired of posting meaningless crap which nobody is ever going to remember on this blog and message boards. I am tired of human interaction. I am tired of conversation. I am tired of being social. I am tired of everything. I am tired of being told what to do. I am tired of thinking for myself. I am tired of being me. I am tired of trying to change myself. I am tired of this relationship-oriented society that we live in, and of being forced to conform to the ideals of that society. I am tired of not conforming to those ideals. I am tired of consciously trying to be unconscious. I am tired of taunting myself by having goals for the future. I am tired of having unfulfilled goals. I am tired of being alone. I am tired of being unhappy. I am tired of myself. I am tired of others. I am tired of not being able to change myself or others. I am tired of not being in love. I am tired of resigning myself to the fact that I will never be in love. I am tired of convincing myself that I will eventually find love. I am tired of just about fucking everything.

I think that this is in medical terms called depression.


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